Breaking the Silence

It's been a while that I have not updated my blog. So may be it's about time to "break the silence" by simply sharing my thoughts and reflections. I'd like to focus my sharing on how I had experienced breakthroughs lately. I would say that these breakthroughs are also forms of "breaking the silence", in the sense that I was able to go back and do things I used to do before but had not been doing;

1. I used to jog early in the morning but had stopped doing it since I went through a spiritual discipline. I always wanted to go back to that habit but had failed many times. But Lately, I'm glad that I'm beginning to push myself again. In fact I just had my jogging this morning. Added to that, I found myself really getting interested in fitness. May be I'm just being pushed by friends and people around who'd been telling me from time to time that I am increasingly gaining wait.

2.  I used to enjoy visiting to our home place, refreshing myself and connecting back with people especially during fruits season. But I have not been there for almost two years because of busy schedules. But just this weekend, I was able to visit my parents' place and refreshed my memories of innocence and simplicity. It feels good to look back and reflect how the Lord brought me to where I am right now

3. I had started to have my driving practice two years ago but I have not really seen progress with my confidence. I got my first SP expired since I didn't want to have my license for the sake of having it. I got my second SP last May and I had been planning to really get back to my driving practice and face my fears. But months had passed and I have not done anything about my plan yet. However, last friday, I had finally pushed myself to start my driving practice again since it's offered for free. In fact, I had my driving session this afternoon. My instructor (who is my friend) let me drive home from our practice area. Wow that was scary I know he was scared too but I made it. We arrived home alive and kicking. Thank you Lord.

I know there still a lot to break in my life but may be not silence anymore but noise (hehe). That needs another page of reflection. Until next time. Thanks for reading.

No to Bitterness; Yes to Forgiveness

In our radio program today, one listener inquired on the issue of forgiveness. Specifically, the inquiry centered on the right timing of releasing forgiveness and the right way of relating back to the offender. 

These are very interesting questions. Many of us are really confused on when to forgive. A lot of us want the pain to linger and kept our hearts bitter. Of course we should be hurt when we are offended, that makes us human. It is alright to feel the pain of betrayal, disappointments and all forms of abuse. In fact, it is only when we recognize the pain that we could begin to experience the process of healing. Forgiveness is real and more meaningful when we are able to forgive despite of the pain. 

It is not easy to forgive, it is not our nature. We want revenge in the name of justice. We want vengeance in our hands. We may not necessarily do it but we certainly think about it. Worst when we make plans on how to go about it and end up doing it only to realize that it's not worth it.

It's not worth our time to delay forgiveness when we can do it now. It's not worth to lost the joy peace and serenity that a forgiving heart could bring. It's worth to free yourself from the heaviness of bitterness and experience the lightness of kindness. It is worth to make it a lifestyle to enjoy God's grace and forgiveness and passed it on to others. Because it's only when we experience God's forgiveness that we are able to forgive others.

 

However forgiveness is not necessarily taking away the consequences of the action of the offender. The person needs to face the consequences of his or her choice. Forgiveness is not necessarily trusting again the person right away. Forgiveness can be done right away but trust needs to be earned through time. Forgiveness is not also forgetting because we can't really forget things. In fact it is when remembering the offense and not feeling its pain anymore that we have actually experience healing.

Seems difficult, right? Yes it is! That's why, we need God's grace and help to maintain healthy relationships and to make it a habit not just to say no to bitterness and yes to forgiveness but, to live by it with our whole hearts.

My Work Out Experience

When my friends had started working out, they'd been pushing me to go with them to the gym and start to work out as well. Since it wasn't really my priority, I always have reasons for not going. But this morning, I finally was able to try it.

Since it was my first official work out experience, I didn't care much with the necessary things to bring. When we got to the locker, I was informed that I need to have my sports shoes, so we had to go back to the apartment and get it.(hehe)

We started our work out with 20 minutes on the cardio stepper equipment to regulate our heartbeat rate (I hope I'm right). It was a fun thing to do while watching cable TV. After that, my friend looked for an instructor for me only to find out that I have to fill up a form for guest users first.

After a while, I was finally introduced to my instructor. The instructor was helpful in directing me to the appropriate equipment for a starter like me. I enjoyed the tension and relief of lifting, pushing and stretching my body parts. ( I hope I won't suffer muscle pain tomorrow).

We ended our work out by jogging in their 200-meter area while talking about possibility of my coming back again. I think I will come back and try to make it regular. Finally, we went home after taking shower in their nice bathroom. Actually they have jacuzzi and sauna inclusive of the package.

Thanks to my friend who diligently invited me to do something with my body. (hehe) This is necessary for my wellness inside out. It's my turn to encourage you to try it too. (hehe)

Manage Your Stress Well

The series of workshop on stress management I facilitated had finally been completed. For the month of September, I conducted 8 sessions among college students and 1 session among christian leaders studying in the graduate seminary. It's funny how I felt so stressed out after my first day of workshop. I went home so tired. Although, I received two invitations to go out that night, I decided to stay home and relax to regain my strength for the next day.

 I felt good for my decision because I was able to take responsibility for my actions-basically applying what I was teaching. I was able to say no without the feeling of guilt. The next series of sessions were manageable. I had adjusted well and probably had started to master the flow of the workshop.

Two of the highlight activities in these workshops are the relaxation techniques and the guided meditation I facilitated. When I started doing research on these, I felt inadequate to facilitate. I was not sure if I can do it effectively. However, in my experience with the participants, I can now attest to its effectivity in relieving stress. In fact I'm aiming to practice these regularly.

There are still pending invitations for me to conduct the workshop and I'm excited about it. If you feel that your group can benefit from this kind of workshop, let me know and will see how we can help one another and work together.

Becoming a Brother's Keeper

More than an hour had passed since we ended our men's network meeting in our church office but my mind still lingers on what had transpired in that meeting. It's amazing how God handpicked each one of us to be a part in this team of strugglers, adventurers and conquerors. It's amazing how the Lord provided me a lot of "brother's keeper" who are committed to journey with me in this battle of life.

Being in the battle alone can be very difficult. In fact it was never God's intention. He wants us to guard one another, to keep watching after our brother's safety. In other words, God simply wants us to be our brother's keeper.

There are great benefits of being under the cover of brother's protection. However it takes great courage for us to admit that we need each other. We are naturally independent and less relational. Nonetheless, we need to recognize and welcome the opportunities of being connected and accountable to one another.

To become a good brother's keeper, I suggest the following;

1. Be true to yourself and others. Share both your strengths and weaknesses. Don't pretend that your life is well when it's not. Share your

 own experiences of success and failure. People will appreciate more when we are true and honest.

2. Be a good encourager. The best way to be an encouragement to your brothers is of assuring them of your unconditional acceptance. Don't be quick to pass on judgment but instead be a good listener. Assure them of your support and your prayer for them.

3. Be a true friend. Don't assert your authority over them but instead offer true friendship. Enjoy their company and incorporate humor. People will recognize it whether your intention is sincere or is only out of brotherly obligation. Cultivate joy in your heart and it will overflow through your conversation and connections with them.

Enjoy the blessings of being a brother's keeper!

A Half-year Adventure Across the Distance

Exactly six months had passed since Pamela and I had our relationship official. As I looked back, I’m still amazed of how the Lord had brought as together last march 17 of this year.

The adventure is pretty challenging. Yes, it brought comfort and joy to my heart knowing that someone had entrusted her heart to mine. However, it also brought some uncomfortable feelings especially in those moments that I have to teach myself to guard and take care of this precious heart entrusted to me.

This half-year adventure marks an important point in our relationship. I would call it as a celebration of love and life because my life had grown as I enjoyed her love.

Six things I would like to thank God for this love and life adventure with my dear Pamela across the distance.

1. I thank God for giving me the best woman who loves me and makes me feel special 

2. I thank God for giving me the best woman who believes on me and my dreams.

3. I thank God for giving me the best woman who seeks to understand and partners with me in God’s calling.

4. I thank God for entrusting to me a great woman whom I can share my love and care.

5. I thank God for entrusting to me a great woman whom I can share my hopes and my dreams.

6. I thank God for entrusting to me a great woman whom I can journey with in seasons of grace, pain and healing.

In all these things, I continue to trust God as we wait for the right time for us to be together 

 (i wrote this yesterday as my gift for pam)

A Hopeless Case?

Is there such a hopeless case? Is there such a person beyond cure? I was reminding myself to stay positive despite of the sad and painful realities I often encounter with my clients. I want to be firm with my faith that God is able. He is able to deliver them from their problems. He is able to heal their wounds and He is able to transform their minds.

In the human perspective, it's easy to give up hope. Sometimes, we don't need to choose to give up hope because it's our tendency. But the good thing is we can always choose to be hopeful. We can always choose to stay positive despite of negative things happening around us. 

The ability to choose to be positive requires faith on God. Faith that God will not give up on us because He is our hope. And if He is our hope, we can be assured that even if we give up hope, HOPE (GOD) never gives up on us.

Having this perspective helped me a lot in dealing with my clients. I see every baby steps they take towards recovery as evidences of God's hope operating within.I believe that reaching to the point of hopelessness is the beginning of new hope. Therefore, there is no such thing as hopeless case, there's no person that's  beyond cure in God's school of wellness.

The Five love Langauges

Do you know your love language? Do you know the love language of the people you love? Yesterday, I had a chance to talk about this topic with the youth of CCF davao. The five love languages is a book written by Dr. Gary Chapman.

Below is the content of my presentation.

I. Introduction

a. About love

 Psychologists have concluded that the need to feel loved is a primary human emotional need. For love, we will climb mountains, cross seas, traverse desert sands, and endure untold hardships.” 

 Inside every person is an `emotional tank' waiting to be filled with love. When a person really feels loved, he will develop normally but when the love tank is empty, the person will misbehave.

b. The Commandment to love

 Jesus Christ wanted love to be the distinguishing characteristic of his followers

 John 13:34-35-“I give you a new commandment, that you love one another.  Just as I have loved you, you also should love one another.  By this everyone will know that you are my disciples, if you have love for one another.”

c. Discover your love language

LOVE LANGUAGE QUIZ

Please rank in order the five statements according to how you feel loved the most (1 is the highest and 5 is the lowest

____I feel especially loved when people express how grateful they are for me, for the simple, everyday things I do.

____I feel especially loved when a person gives me undivided attention and spends time alone with me.

____I feel especially loved by someone who brings me gifts and other tangible expressions of love.

____I feel especially loved when someone pitches in to help me, perhaps by running errands (photocopy, paying bills) or taking part on my household chores (or finishing my projects).

____ I feel especially loved when a person expresses feeling for me through physical contact.

II. Love Language Descriptions

The sequence of description is the same with the sequence of items in the quiz. Therefore if you have marked item number one as your rank 1 then you will have description 1 (a) as your primary love language. The one you rank no 2 is your secondary.

a. Words of affirmation

You have chosen words of affirmation as your primary love language. You feel loved when another person tells you that he or she values you as a person and appreciates your special way with the most ordinary tasks.

What are the kinds of words we can use to affirm them?

Warm-hearted

Optimistic

Real

Diverse

Specific

b. Quality Time

You have chosen quality time as your primary love language. You feel closest to another person when you receive focused attention.

How can we give quality time to them?

Totally focus attention

Involved in deep conversation

Move away from destruction

Engage in enjoyable activity

c. Receiving Gifts

You have chosen receiving gifts as your primary love language. Tangible expressions of love assure you that the other person is not only thinking of you, but that he or she cares enough to show it.

How significance gift is?

Gives Extra Worth 

Imprints Memories

Fosters Closeness (Intimacy)

Touches Hearts

Symbolizes love

d. Acts of Service

You have chosen Acts of Service as your primary love language. You feel most loved when someone helps you carry out your responsibilities.

What kind of services can we give?

Accommodating

Caring

Teaching

Supporting

e. Physical Touch

You have chosen Physical Touch as your primary love language. You feel most loved when you literally make contact with another person. You enjoy being embraced and feeling another’s touch.

What are the forms of appropriate Physical Touch?

Tap in the back for comfort

Open arms for security

Unclenched fist for welcoming

Cool handshakes for celebration

Hugs and Kisses for Greetings

III. The Love Language of God

a. God  Affirms us as the reflection of His image

Genesis 1:26

Then God said, "Let us make man in our image, in our likeness, and let them rule over the fish of the sea and the birds of the air, over the livestock, over all the earth, [b] and over all the creatures that move along the ground.

b. God Spends Time watching over us

Hebrews 13:5b

"Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you.”

c. God gave His Son as a gift for us

John 3:16

For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life.

d. God sent Jesus to serve us

Mark 10: 45

“For even the Son of Man did not come to be served, but to serve, and to give his life as a ransom for many."

e. God welcomes us in His loving Arms

Isaiah 40:11

He tends his flock like a shepherd:  He gathers the lambs in his arms and carries them close to his heart; he gently leads those that have young.

IV. Concluding Suggestions

a. Speak your love language

b. Learn to speak the love language of others

c. Experience the love of God everyday

My Wounded Feet

Yesterday, I had the privilege to enjoy a free day tour at bali-bali beach resort. It was a great way to celebrate holiday with one of the families in the church who had their relative on vacation here in the Philippines.

While taking a break from a short snorkeling session, I was playing around with a kid. He was wearing his googles and trying to view what's on the deep . I wanted to teased him so I was moving my feet up near to place where he wanted to take a view. When he recognized my feet, I put it down and it hit a coral. It was painful and blood was starting to come out. It wasn't really that serious but it made me decide to stay away from the beach and do something else.

I didn't really feel any pain and had enjoyed the rest of the day playing around, swimming, singing and eating. Even when I got home, I still had managed to meet my cell group. Even when I was ready to sleep, I didn't feel serious pain.

However, when I woke up this morning, I felt a little pain especially when I wore my slippers and I could not walk straightly. "How much more if I'm going to wear my shoes?" I began to ask myself and concluded that it would really be painful. I started to entertain the necessity of just staying home.

 I know that I have set some appointments in the counseling center and I need to be there. But I have decided to take a good rest today. I could not keep on thinking about others needs but deprive myself of my need to rest and revitalize my strength and energy. I could have forced myself to go out and meet my clients but at the end of the day, would suffer the pain of my self negligence. The truth is, I need to take good care of myself so I can give better care for others.

As I reflected upon this experience, I believe that my wound had served a divine purpose. It made me realized that to keep on becoming an effective instrument of healing, I need to take good care of my own wounds no matter how little they are. My wound on my feet was not really that serious but it made me decide to cancel my appointments for the day.  Added to that, I may need to allow others to take care of my wounds if taking care of it alone would not bring out the necessary healing anymore. 

I thank God for allowing this wound in my feet to teach me wonderful lessons in life. I know it's in the process of healing. Eventually its little scars would remind me to use my feet responsibly; to stay home when I shouldn't be moving around, and to move out and fulfill my purpose when God tells me to go.

A True Friend

I am a relational type person. I love to be around with people, I love the thrill that I feel when I am relating with my friends and I enjoy the opportunity of meeting and connecting with new people. That's why people often see me moving around in a party or gathering.

One time I was asked if I ever had a best friend. I seemed to enjoy whomever I get around with, so may be I have a lot. But if it's best, then it couldn't be many. I think I had been through many "best friends" in my life at different times. Interestingly, the way I view friendship before in comparison to my perspective right now had changed.

When I was asked with the question, I had names in my mind, but I don't label them as best friends right now although they fall into that category basing on how we treated each other. I love to call them as my true friends. True friends because they were...

T-rue. They don't hang around with me just because they wanted to get something from me. They have been there for me in different seasons. They mean what they say and they say what they mean because they want me to grow.

R-espectful. They don't force me to do something or manipulate my emotions. They respect my boundaries and honor my decisions. We've learned to enjoy each others differences and we continue to desire that we will live out our destiny in God and fulfill His purposes for our lives.

U-nconditionally Loving. They were committed to love me despite of my weaknesses, failures and tendencies. They might not have expressed that verbally, but their presence and their willingness to listen to my stories had shown that love to me. We may have some fights and misunderstandings as human beings, but we seek to forgive and love one another.

E-difying. They build my life up through their trust and confidence on my capacities. But more than that they were committed to pray for me because they trust God to fulfill His best plans for me. Their commitment to follow God had also served as an encouragement to me. The care, the accountability and the warm company means so much to me as I move forward to follow God wholeheartedly.

I'm sure there's a lot more to describe how they had been true friends to me. I desire that I would always be true to them as the Lord helps me. I may not be the best of their friends, but I can be their true friend. They may not be my best of friends but their being "true friend" is more than enough for me. Most importantly, I will never lose sight of God as my ever true friend.

Coming of Age

The baby is now a lady! This statement brings with it the excitement, the joy and the merriment of coming of age from being a girl to becoming a woman. In the Philippines, we call this celebration as "debut". When a young lady turns 18, the parents usually offer a special celebration for their former little girl. The celebration varies. With those who can afford an elaborate party, they usually have elegant celebrations in the hotels. Others, do the celebration in their own house, usually outside the house for bigger and open space. But still others, didn't have the chance to do this kind of celebration for different reasons.

As a young adult working with young people, I had many opportunities to witness the coming of age of our youth in the church and at times  among the christian community here in Davao City. I could not count how many times I have been to debut parties. Sometimes, I came as an escort of the debutante, many times I was included in the list of their 18 roses. But lately, I didn't get those kind of roles anymore. Instead I would always be asked to be the host. Although being a host of a party can be challenging, I found myself enjoying it. I like the privilege of thinking creatively on how to make the celebration a meaningful and special one not just for the debutant but for everyone.

The last celebration I hosted was last saturday night. It was the debut of one of our youth in the church held at rancher's grill. It wasn't really an elaborate celebration but a simple and heartfelt one. The parents sincerely intended the celebration to be a "passage to womanhood ceremony" where the debutante's parents released her to womanhood with blessings and prayers. The celebration was centered on God. God was the star of the party because of the different testimonies on how God used the debutante to touch the lives of her friends. The debutant herself concluded the party by sharing her Bible reading for that day. It was so interesting because the original plan was to end with "party dancing" but it end up with praising to the Lord.

Indeed it was a celebration of life, love and God. The coming of age does not only pertains to the numbers but to the number of years of God's faithfulness of making life's existence meaningful and filled with purpose.

The Adventure of Letting Go

It's not surprising for me anymore every time I hear a friend leaving or moving to a new place. I truly understood that each one has his or her own destiny to fulfill in life that only God clearly knows. But it doesn't mean that I am becoming immune to the unpleasant feeling of letting go of people who has been a part of my journey. 

This week, I have two friends who will be moving out from Davao. The first one is a member of my cell group. I met him when he was in college and shared the gospel to him. He grew in His relationship with God and became one of our youth leaders in the church. I witness how the Lord had changed him and used him. However, the Lord had opened an opportunity for Him to work in the Middle east and he is now preparing his way to go there. I am happy for him. I know that as much as I want to keep him here so we can do ministry together, God has a better plan for him

The second one is like a brother to me. He has been my computer mentor especially with my macbook. I met him when he was in high school and did bible study with him and his friends. Although his spiritual feeding had been through his church, we still had kept in touch and had regularly updated each other's life journey. I also witnessed how the Lord had worked in his life and how he had become a blessing to others and to me.  Now that he had  graduated in college, he sensed the need to be trained so that he will be maximized for God's Kingdom. He will be leaving for manila on sunday to be trained in Campus Crusade for Christ where both of his parents are missionaries. I am so excited as the Lord is starting to unfold His great plans for him. 

I thank the Lord for giving me opportunities to journey with these friends. I thank Him for the comfort I feel in knowing that He is there to lead us to where He wants us to go and grow. I thank Him for the adventure of letting go, the excitement of expecting the next He will do and the confidence of trusting Him so.

with me here is hesedel the one who will join CCC training

The Power of Words

Words are powerful. It could bring life or it could destroy a person. It can make someone happy but it can also break one's heart. It can build up faith but it can also devastate one's confidence.

This week I had an opportunity to witness how words uttered carelessly had destroyed the winning atmosphere in a certain team. Audibly, I heard the cry of someone who felt judged, condemned and mistreated. I've seen the wall of defense building up higher and higher. The trust was broken and no one owns the blame. The seed of denial and apathy had started to sprout. The former happy and loving relationship had turned sour and unbecoming. The former crown had become a thorn. A source of anxiety, worries and stress. What has become of the relationship? What had brought it there?

For this person I met, It's simply the negative words uttered in the guise of care and concern. She expected to be understood, protected and lifted up on that desperate moment but instead she felt being stabbed leaving wounds of words like sword. What could be done to patch up things? How could a wounded heart experience healing?

If negative words had broken down the relationships, positive words would be the best tool to rebuild it. Positive words like "I'm sorry", "forgive me" and "I admit I have hurt you" have such powerful healing capacity. It can break down the walls and defenses. It can soften the heart, it can bring forgiveness and reconciliation. 

This is what I've witness with the people I have journeyed with this week. Some were moved to shed tears while others exchanged warm embrace as a sign of a new beginning.

Words are indeed powerful. It can bring blessing or in can bring curse. That's why we need to choose to listen to the voice of God affirming us and assuring us of His unconditional love and best plan for us. It is only then that we are able to utter positive words for others when we are positive about our standing with God.

Be careful then what comes out from your mouth from now on.

Experience Stress Debriefing

"I'm stressed out", I don't know how many times I heard this statement from different people I had conversations, with regards to their field of work. The percentage is even higher among students. I have to be honest that I have uttered this statement too. 

Last semester, I was invited to conduct a workshop on stress management. In the process of preparing, I have learned valuable truths on how I have personally managed my own stressors and what else can I do to make it even better.

This semester, I was invited again to conduct the same workshop to around 1000 nursing students in one the colleges here in davao. It's a challenging opportunity to help our future nurses to apply self-care so that can give best care to their patients.

I'm excited on how the Lord is starting to open up more opportunities for personal and professional growth to extend my services not only to students but to my fellow help providers as well. This coming thursday and friday, I will be conducting stress debriefing and team building among the staff of RBI (Resources for the blind). Stress debriefing is more extensive than just conducting workshop on stress management. In stress debriefing, the participants would be able to process themselves with regards to the stressors that might have impede their complete functioning. It is necessary for those who are in the helping profession to experience supervision. 

I found it highly important among missionaries too, especially those who are in a cross-cultural missions. They need to experience stress debriefing of their varied mission experiences when they go back to their home country. This is the thing that I am discovering. I am starting to  conduct stress debriefing in one of our missionaries and hoping to let this opportunity be spread out.

You may contact me in the following numbers if you are interested to avail of this service. You may also refer this service to your company or to your friend. Thank you and God bless us all.

Adrian A. Bontuyan

09274853695

(082) 2271731

Wazzup?

"Wazzup" is a coined filipino word. It's actually a spontaneous utterance of the phrase "what's up". It is commonly used by our youth today. It could be categorized as one of the slangs in the Filipino language.

I usually used this word whenever I start a conversation with someone may it be in a chat or in a face to face conversation. I also have a friend who usually asked me that question but he even shorten it into one syllable "zup". At least that shortens the effort of typing and utterance.

Well may be some of you might want to ask wazzup with my blog adventure? I confess that I have not updated my blog as often as before. I was caught with many things to do and I don't have enough time to write anymore. However I won't miss this time to answer the question wazzup with my counseling passion.

In my previous entry, I shared about the counseling room that I had begun to use and made-over. This week I had my first private client. It was so affirming when she commented how beautiful the atmosphere of the room was. She was so grateful of our meeting as well.

 I'm so grateful how the Lord is causing my counseling career to start flourishing. I am receiving more invitations to speak on stress management. An NGO had requested me to conduct stress debriefing among their staff and workers.

I attribute all these opportunities to God as He is opening more doors for His love, peace and rest to be shared and expereinced by people through this counseling ministry He has entrusted to me. May we all experience God's peace and rest everyday as we fulfill His calling.

A Sense of Accomplishment

This week was filled with excitement. I finally had met with some of my clients at the seminary. I had been reviewing the results of the psychological exams they've taken.  I had been preparing how I could present to them the results so they would be aware of their strengths and weaknesses. It wasn't an easy task. Until now, I still am learning how to be a good communicator.

One of the things that gave me a sense of accomplishment this week was the progress of my project to make the counseling center more conducive for counseling. It made me excited as I exercise my creativity in utilizing the space and the facilities available. Below are the pictures we've taken today before I left the center. Hope you would give a visit sometimes. You need not go there as a client, you may go there as a friend.

I took that sofa from the library. Thanks to the generosity of Alne-our librarian. 

The plants were taken from the garden outside. Thanks for the kindness of jun2x-our caretaker.

The Winning Attitude: The Pacquiao and Diaz Fight

The entire Filipino people were filled with enthusiasm cheering up for Manny Pacquiao as he secured his victory over Diaz by a KO in round nine of the fight. Pacquiao had shown his boxing prowess as he consistently dominated each round. He certainly had impressed the crowd and all the people watching all over the world.

I am not really fond of watching boxing competitions but with Pacquio's fame, I could not help but cheer up as well every time he shows off his fast and hard punches right on his opponent's face. I sometimes raise my hands in victory when he wins the fight through a KO. I truly salute Manny Pacquiao.

I salute him, not only because of his undefeated records but mostly because of his winning attitude. He had come a long way from where he started in his town in Gensan. He was always positive about his fight and he always had paid the price of training, hard work and discipline.

I would say, that we need to possess the same winning attitude, if we are to be winners in our own battles in life. We need to be positive about our situation and condition. We need to be serious in our daily training of becoming stronger and better. Above all, we need to be people who diligently exercise discipline everyday.

The whole world may not cheer up on us as we celebrate our own little victories but we made a great contribution as we added the number of winners in this world. And as we do that, we are paving our way to our destiny. For God has destined us for victory.

Who is in Control?

We were ready to load up things from our office to the venue of our IXTHUS GENERATION's YEAR 4 CELBRATION when the rain started to come. It seemed like every drop of rain from the sky was an added weight to my worry of what would become of our night gathering. I went out from the office looking for any signs of miracle. My thoughts were filled with pessimism. I thought of canceling the event. I wondered if there would be anyone who would still be interested to travel from where they are to the place of our celebration in the middle of that heavy rain..

I started to text people for prayer after I uttered my prayer to God. I can't keep myself from worrying. But then God reminded me of His word for us last night during our prayer time. I was internalizing the truth of His word that; " It's not by might, not by power but by the Spirit of God". I was declaring that By the Spirit of God, things would still turn out right.

The rain didn't totally stop but it had subsided a little, so we were able to load up things and transport it to the venue. Few people started to come and help us setting up the stage. After a while group of people started to crowd in the place. I was not concern of the number anymore, I was just so happy seeing them came and was excited to celebrate with us despite of the rain.

We were not able to start on time according to our plan but I realized that on God's timeframe, it was really the perfect time. In the middle of my talk around 30 students came eager and was excited to step in on what was happening. If we have really started on time, we could have been almost over when they arrived. But God wanted them to hear the word and see the video that caused them to reflect upon the reality of the weight of their own world away from God.

When I was about to sleep one of those 30 students sent me a text simply expressing her appreciation. This was the content of her message; "helo kuya dhrey, wala lng juz want 2 thank u kay, sekreto..hehe bsta salamat kuya drey...Gudnyt. Godblez". After I read that text message, I was moved to thank God for sealing in the truth that truly He is always in control. He is in control of nature. He is in control of time. He is in control of everything. Wow! I would never regret the choice I made to give Him the control over my life. 

How about you? Who is control of your life? Would you be willing to give God the control? Think and ponder!

A New Beginning

A week ago, my laptop crashed. It was a bad  and sad experience. I lost all my files in an instant. I wanted to be angry at myself for being careless. I regretted so much for not making a backup for my files. But what could  I do except to learn to live anew. I don't want to waste my time thinking about it anymore. It's time for a new beginning.

Before I burry the memory of this experience, I would not want to miss out the opportunity to learn from this school of misfortune. In fact, I would not call it as misfortune. I believed that what happened had served a purpose for my personal growth. In other words, God allowed it to happen for me to realize that my laptop had become an extension of my life. It became the source of fulfillment. It had started to take over God's place in my life. Thanks be to God for his divine intervention.

Though it's not easy for me to just let go of my old files considering the significance and importance of it to what I am doing now in my profession. I have to accept that letting go of it is not an option anymore. It was gone. It has dawned on me that truly, I could not rely on my past records. I need to wait upon God for fresh and new insights.

In reality, we always have to face a new beginning. For every chapter that ends in the pages of our life's existence, is a new beginning of a new story. For every seemingly lost memory, is a new space for creating new and exciting memories. For every time we choose to let go, we are freeing ourselves for a new adventure, new opportunities to build life, to build friendships and to build happy memories.

I am happy as God welcomes me to my new beginning!

I lost one treasure

It's been a while since I haven't posted in this blog. It's not because I don't want to write anymore. Simply because of the sad fact that my laptop crashed last monday. It's still in the shop now.

Numerous thoughts came to my mind since I didn't have my laptop on my hand. It's difficult but it served it purpose. Will share more of it when I get time to write longer.

Please help me pray that I would have my laptop soon. Thanks

Beauty in the Ordinary

Whenever I think of writing a new entry for my blog, I always think about something special. I want to highlight something extra ordinary, something that made my day beyond the usual.

My life this week was not so exciting. Nothing so big had taken place. It seems like everything was in a slow motion. I didn't feel bad but I didn't feel good either.  I wanted to see something spectacular but things seems going round and round.

However most of the time, it's in the ordinary moments of my journey, that God reveals Himself special. It is when I don't have anything big to look forward into that I begin to look up unto Him with great expectation. It is when I look up to Him that I realized there's  none in this world bigger than He is. 

The richness and beauty of life is not dependent on how we feel about our performance. It can't be measured by the number of events we thought were so spectacular. It's not determined by the moments we considered as very special.

Life is richer, when we learn to find its beauty in the ordinary. Life is better when we find the way to be happy in spite of what we feel, what we hear, what see and we didn't see. Life is fuller, when we experience how God would make us feel special even if things around us were entirely ordinary.

In the Name of Love

During our radio program today, one of our listeners sent a question asking us how many types of love do we have in this world. Is there such a a thing as "good love" in contrast to a "bad love"? This is synonymous to a question whether if there's such a "right love" in contrast to a "wrong love". We may think that it is a very simple question but it did cause us to ponder.

 

If we look around us, if we listen to the stories of people we know, we would begin to realize how many people have been wounded because of this thing called love. Many had unintentionally incurred pain and broke someone's heart in the name of love. Many had been victimized. The word love had been exploited.

On the other hand, we could not also disregard the wonderful stories of those who had found their true love. We could not help but be inspired on how two hearts had found its way to become one. We celebrate with them. Sometimes we even covet their joy and wish for our time to come. We begin to dream and visualize for our true love to come.

Considering the contrasting scenarios, we could rightly assume that love might really be divided into two. It is good for those who had experience its joy and pleasure. Consequently, it is bad for those who had been in pain and been victimized by its sweet promises that turned sour and bitter.

If we are going to believe  and accept that assumption, we are only defining love in the worldly dimension. We need to go back to how our God defines love. If we read 1 Corinthians chapter 13, we would realize how good love is. Verse five says, "love is not rude". The whole chapter described love so positively that there was never a hint of badness in it.

The bottom line is this; love in itself is good. The one who got in loved goes from less than good to being bad and even to worst. That's who we are. Human! Frail and prone to fall and fail. That's why we need God's love to bring healing to our wounded hearts. We need first to receive His love so that we could be given to give away love. He is the perfect example of how to show love. He lay down His life for us, In the name of love. 

The Strength of My Heart

I woke up today with a very low energy. In fact I didn't want to wake up at all. Basically, it's because I stayed late last night. Knowing that today is a holiday, I didn't bother to care so much in getting ready for my monday appointments. I feel that I deserve some rest after a week of getting back to my busy schedules.

I always want to start my day right despite of how I feel. To make that happen, I make it a habit to pray, listen to music and read my bible before going out from my room to start a work and mingle with housemates.

Today's reading was very timely. It's in Psalm 73. Verse 26 had spoke right into my heart. It's an awesome declaration of God's sufficiency in my life in the midst of disappointments. It says, "my flesh and my heart may fail but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever".

I think my flesh is not feeling good. I felt that I woke up at the wrong side of the bed literally. But as I appropriate God's strength over me, I felt like he had revitalized my strength. I was also reminded to take good care of my body. To check on my eating habits and exercise.

Hy heart was also in limbo. I didn't feel any excitement about doing the things I should do. I don't want to go out. I want to be all by myself. But as I felt God's comfort and love, I also got my heart revived. It feels good to know that God understands how I feel, and that his love for me is never ending. It's not dependent on how I feel. It doesn't matter how many times I may fail. Truly, He is the strength of my heart and my portion forever. 

This day is almost over. I could have remained in my bed and missed out the opportunity to experience His strength. I could have allowed my feelings to dictate me and missed out the joy He had offered. But I thank God, for not only letting me get through the day, but for filling each moment with His power. 

I would say it over and over that God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever and ever. Amen!

I Missed Her

I was browsing through the folders of pictures in my multiply account when the feeling of missing Pamela had sank in. It's been more than a month since we have not seen each other face to face. I missed our time together. I missed the merriment of just being with her.

Below are the 10 most memorable scenes I treasured the most in my time with her here;

1. Sitting beside her during our worship time in the church.
   
2. Texting her to ask what's her plan for the day and how she felt about her appointments.
   
3. Crossing the road and seeing her confused as I moved to the danger side.
   
4.  Answering her questions that moved me to deeply ponder.
   
5. Taking pictures to the places we explored together.
   
6. Watching her enjoying my stories and my simple jokes.
   
7. Visiting coffee shops and enjoy the coffee-talks.
   
8. Introducing her to the people around me; my family and friends.
   
9. Bringing her home after a day and a night of fun.
   
10. Praying with her about us and our future plans

How I wish that we could be together. But I lay it all to God in total surrender. He alone has the timetable and the power for the two of us to be together until forever.

Get High

We've got a new song composition. I wrote the lyrics last night and we've put the tune this afternoon. This will be our theme song for our IXTHUS GENERATION's big night on June 27, 2008 dubbed as "Let's Get High".

GET HIGH

Lyrics by dre, music by ge-r and tom 

I.

Does your burden weigh you down?

Life's turning round and round?

You don't know what to do

 Lost on where to go

 

II.

There’s a place where you can go

Where you can be renewed

God is waiting there for you

Are you ready now to go?

Pre-chorus

Come be filled with awe

Fill your life to overflow

Chorus:

Get high, get high with God

Receive His power from above

Get high, get high with God

Feel His comfort and love

Get High! Get High! Get High!

 

Bridge:

Tell everyone you know

 Lead them where to go

(The lyrics above had been edited. The video below was our first attempt of trying to record the tunes. Enjoy our creativity... will post soon the video of the edited version)

 

Rest for My Soul

Last night, I came home with a drained energy. I woke up early for a whole day leadership summit and I went home late from an invitation to facilitate a group Bible study. I wanted to sleep right away to revitalize my strength but my soul's longing to connect with God was so heavy.

I started to play worship songs and found my heart singing. I felt the intensity of my soul's desire to rest in God's presence after a day of hearing intense challenges in the leadership summit and a night of helping the youth group in facing their life challenges.

While continually enjoying the music, a phrase kept flashing in my mind, so I grabbed my Bible and searched where I have read that phrase before. It's in Psalms 32:8 where God said,"I will instruct you and teach you in the way you should go; I will counsel you and watch over you".

There are four action words in this passage that I was quiet sure God wanted me to be assured of; (1)He is going to instruct me, (2) he is going to teach me, (3) He is going to counsel me, and (4) He is going to watch over me.

I knew in my heart that those were the words I needed from God last night. I have a lot of things I knew I needed to do. I have a lot of plans that I wanted to pursue. On top of that, I have a number of people that I so desired to grow-to do what they need to do just like what I should suppose to do. But the truth was, last night I didn't know what to do.

But those words were so powerful. It reminded me that even if I think I didn't know what to do or even if I really don't know what to do, God surely knows what to do. I have to constantly ask for instructions. I have to always seek His direction. I need to persistently walk in His counsel. And I have to always believe that He will watch over me, go ahead of me and will fight for me.

As I laid my head to sleep, my heart was thankful to the Lord. My soul had found rest in quietness and trust to my God. 

The Gift of Silence

I'm in the library while writing this blog today. It's not totally silent here. I can hear the sound of the air-con. I can overhear other people's conversation. But at least there's a certain silence that makes me feel relax, peaceful and restful (it's a good place to sleep! I'm yawning now. hehe).

However, there's a kind of silence that's not dependent on the noise outside. It's an inward silence. We may call it the silence of the mind or the silence of the heart. I would want to describe my mind and heart today as silent. I don't even know if my description is right. When I thought about what to write on the blog, I could not think of anything. When I searched my heart for a magical feeling, until now my heart is still resting.

I'm not an alien to this kind of silence. But for the past three weeks, I realized that my mind was so engaged with life's twists and realities. My heart was so captivated with the differing emotions propelled by my reflections and contemplations. 

I like to think that my life was in constant motion. My body was at rest but my mind is filled with notions. My blog had become my pre occupation. It makes my heart wander, sometimes far away.

But today, I started to enjoy the gift of silence. My mind is at peace. My heart is at rest. My body is relaxing. 

Time to Play

Its been a while since I haven't had a time to play sports. I'd been looking forward to play badminton again and experience the pleasure of moving around, smashing and dropping and simply being inside the court . 

Finally, I had a chance to play again last night with my friday cell group. It was a very good break time. I was not only relieved from tensions but it also helped break down the walls of pretensions in my group. We got real when we're inside the court. We've freely expressed our excitements and dismays. We've learned to say sorry when we miss to hit the shuttle cock . We've learned to utter words of affirmation. We've shown gestures of love. 

Since we only rented one court for the group, not everyone of us can play at the same time. So during my break time, I had a chance to talk with one of our group members who had been  sporadic in joining our cell meetings. He used to be very reserved and avoids conversation but last night he seemed to be very open and lively. He started to share about his emotional condition. He relayed that he just broke up with his girlfriend a week ago. He wanted to get back to God and rebuild his ruined life. He felt like he lost his identity since his life started to revolved around that woman. But now he wanted it back.

I affirmed him for taking such courage to make that right decision. I've personally witness how the relationship had dragged him away from God and his family and I'm just happy to see how the Lord had answered my prayers that God will open his eyes. I'm excited on how the Lord will bring restoration and healing in his life and his family.

It wasn't my intention to turned my play time to a counseling time but I believe that God used our play time to create an atmosphere of openness so he can freely share. In fact he was thankful for that play because it helped him get through another day with excitement.

I went home still feeling the pleasure of the game but more than that I brought home with me the joy of being able to hear his story. Then I realized that the time to play was over...the time to pray had begun.